Movie Reviews
I'm Not Okay, I Promise
The Crazies
posted by Kattastrophe on March 07, 2010
The problem with zombie movies is that zombies really only have one motivation—to eat. It’s scary, yeah, but it it’s not terrifying. People are far more terrifying than zombies. People have so many wants. They react to things. Zombies… well, they just GO.
The rules of society keep most people in line. They keep people from doing awful things to one another. Our brain tells us that no matter how much we want to hurt someone, it’s not okay. We’ll get arrested, we’ll be ostracized. The... Read more...
All's Right With the World
The Book of Eli
posted by Kattastrophe on March 07, 2010
It's a common theme in post-apocalyptic fiction that humans are generally so lazy and self-serving that when the end comes, those left will do nothing at all to clean up. Roads will still be clogged with abandoned cars. Dead bodies will rot inside houses. Utility stations will never be repaired. Murderers will run the town and everything will pretty much have to gone to shit.
The Book of Eli is the first movie I've seen that gave a reason for it. Thirty years after "the Big Flash" Eli... Read more...
You're Not Who You Think You Are
Shutter Island
posted by JoVo on February 28, 2010
I first heard of this movie watching videos online. Ads for it were everywhere, and they saturated my media so much that I got to the point where I didn't want to hear anything else about the movie. Then Topher wanted to go see the movie. So did Kaz and Zeke, so how could I resist? I'd seen the trailers, the movie looked cool, what was there to lose?
It was worth it. Shutter Island was greatly entertaining, beautifully constructed, and thought-provoking. And it's always nice to see... Read more...
They Make Them Like They Used To
The Wolfman
posted by Ezekiel on February 24, 2010
I never actually saw the original "Wolfman", be it for laziness or sheer force of will. I had this rule to never watch a film that was at least 10 years older than me. I grew up in a generation of flashing lights and colors. If this film was anything like the original (minus today's CGI graphics), then I may have to rethink my rule.
This film starring Benicio Del Toro, Emily Blunt, Hugo Weaving, and Anthony Hopkins, was by far the most thrilling look into that old gypsy story of the... Read more...
A Douchebag of Earthsea, and the Douchebags who Ruined the Book
Earthsea
posted by JoVo on February 26, 2010
The major characters of Smallville return to the small screen to provide you with a movie that can only be described as trite. There is nothing to spoil (ergo, no spoiler alert); this movie's so obvious. So, there's an archipelago named Earthsea that, many years ago, was kept at peace by a magical amulet. Now, there's war and violence all over the place. But there's a prophecy that a wizard will come who will make everything better. If only the Middle East had an amulet, right?
I... Read more...
The End Begins!
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
posted by JoVo on February 13, 2010
This is it! This is the year that the final installment of the Harry Potter film series is due to come out, and if you're not excited about it, then you may as well be a Death Eater. As a series, it is enchanting. CGI seems to be getting better and better because, at least to my untrained eye, the magic is beautiful to behold.
In this penultimate installment of the series, Harry returns to Hogwarts in the fall following the year that every wizard in the magical world finally admitted to... Read more...
SplatterPunks Comes To The Big Screen
Midnight Meat Train
posted by Ezekiel on February 12, 2010
I remember when a freind of mine asked me if I liked horror, and sure who here doesn't. What came next I didn't expect, that same friend asked if I had like horror literature. Instantly my mind went to one of my favorite authors, Stephen King and losely followed by some "horror" books I had read as an adolescent. My friend only smirked and said "Then you've not really read horror", and introduced me to SplatterPunks. A collection of short stories that bordered just on this side of depraved.... Read more...
My Money Says You're Not Going Anywhere
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning
posted by Kattastrophe on February 12, 2010
So… I actually kind of honestly liked this movie. I didn’t expect to. I mean, historically speaking, horror prequels are trash. Especially when they’re made thirty years after the original (though, I think it’s technically a prequel to the remake). So, yay for not feeling like I just lost ninety-one minutes of my life. It’s not cinematic genius, but it was totally enjoyable to watch.
I expected that it might follow Tommy/Leatherface (Andrew Bryniarski) a little more closely, as it opens up... Read more...
If this is the way to break it, I don't want it fixed.
Daybreakers
posted by Kazallo on February 12, 2010
With a surge of vampire films hitting the screens these days DayBreakers manages to actually create something fresh within it. In a world where vampires have taken over and hunt what's left of humans to keep the blood flowing into the daily vampire's coffee cup, a story emerges that stakes on the choice between immortally or humanity.
The atmosphere of the world depicted in this film brings up so many more questions than just the hunt for blood. In a society of immortals how does one move up... Read more...
Marvel Meets Magic
Dr. Strange
posted by Ezekiel on February 12, 2010
Most of the time I don't really like animated shows that much, unless it's various types of anime. however in this film I can honestly say that the story was, albeit predictable as comic books go, fairly decent. Enough to earn it 3 glooms here.
If you're bored and want to be entertained with Marvel's least likely super hero, check it out!
Besides it's... Read more...